We may think that if we patiently practise accepting defeat all the time, our suffering and problems will multiply and completely overwhelm us; but in fact the practice of patience always lessens our suffering because we do not add mental pain to the difficulties we are having. Because suffering, worry, depression, and pain are feelings, they are types of mind, so it follows that they exist inside and not outside our mind. If while experiencing adverse conditions our mind remains calm and happy through the practice of patience, we do not have a problem. We may have a challenging situation, and may even be sick or injured, but we are free from pain. By controlling our mind in this way we experience a cessation of our pain, worry, and depression, and find true inner peace. Furthermore, by keeping a peaceful mind in difficult situations we are far more likely to find solutions and respond constructively. Buddhist practice is very gentle. It does not require physical deprivation and hardship but is mainly concerned with the internal task of controlling and transforming the mind. Once we have learned how to do this we shall understand the real meaning of Buddha’s teachings.

In Tibet I met a number of humble practitioners who, although they were not famous, always practised accepting defeat and offering the victory in their daily lives. One of these was a monk called Kachen Sangye, whom people came to recognize as a Bodhisattva. Whenever anyone said anything unpleasant to him he would accept it without retaliating, and whenever anyone asked him for something he would give it immediately without even a hint of miserliness. If he was overcharged while shopping he would pay without comment, and if the shopkeeper was poor he would give him even more. Kachen Sangye’s most expensive possession was a copper pot for holding water. One day while he was out a thief entered his room and stole the pot, but as the thief was making his way down the street he met Kachen Sangye returning to his room. Since the monk knew him, the thief was so ashamed that he dropped the pot and ran off. Kachen Sangye, however, developed the strong desire to give away his copper pot, so he took it to the thief’s house and said to him: ‘You didn’t need to run away. You can take anything you want from my room at anytime!’ People used to say that even if he had been asked to give up his life he would have done so happily. There are many examples in the past of such practitioners, and there is no reason why there should not be practitioners like this now and in the future. Those who are able to think and behave like this do not meet with any problems in life, for they can happily accept whatever situations they find themselves in.